!!!!......Rudeness

    • !!!!......Rudeness


      Hiiii guys,,h r u? hope u all doing well
      i dnt know whats the problem with u guys?why no one want to post new topics or even write replies?Why everyone keep ignoring this forum? we want ur replies guys ,i m not asking 4 more than a thanx for sharing,,thats all

      ANYWAY...this is not my topic

      I want to mention a small thing which happened today. I went to the shops
      this morning and as I reached the shop I was looking for, I saw that there
      was a couple in front of me so I waited my turn. In the meantime another
      lady came there and was waiting on the other side of this couple. Clearly I was
      there first but when those people finished and I was coming forward, she
      butted in and started talking to the attendant. I said politely: excuse me but
      I believe I was waiting before you, she said no I was (who does she think
      she is, I'm not blind), she said: it's ok (as if to completely dismiss me), and I
      said: certainly not, and she just turned her back, and
      :confused: started talking to the attendant like I was not there. How rude is that! Brat


      Another thing,
      I find that while driving and when traffic allows it, I give way to people men and
      women, most men reply with a gesture of thanks, but not
      one single lady does!!! I understand if there was a man who let them pass
      and they did not want to wave or signal their thanks,.... what is their problem
      So sad.. just hope one day they meet their match or
      someone puts them in their place, without them
      .running to their bros or uncles or daddy's... and admit they were wrong

      [grade='FFA500 FF6347 008000 4B0082']reGARds......oMaNi_AsLi[/grade]






    • Thanks OMANI ASLI for your NICE :) morning tips

      actually I don't often come into here not because I don't like the topics but mainly I got bored of English everywhere$$g (this is areal confession) :)
      but what is surprising that in here (I mean the site) are plenty of ladies and gentlemen who do speak English, yet no interaction with the English Forum !!! I find it quite intresting to unvail the reasons for so

      Coming to your topic, I see it is really rude when considering this particular situation of the Lady that popped straight in front of you in the shop and took your turn... I believe we are not talking about queues and system but rather politeness and good manner of dealing in the first place... she should have asked you first if she was in a rush and could not wait any longer

      but to tell the truth I've faced a quite simmilar situation though I believe where I came not only in front of one person but plenty of them $$t (may be eight standing in a queue) but that was in a bank where all the attendees were men... I stood the last but the man in front of me told me to go first >>there I went hisitantly.I asked the first man on the queue to take further permission. he said "we've been standing here for quite long time, does it really matter if we wait a little longer because of you"

      It was obvious that he agreed but with discontent..He had the right to act so.. to tell the truth, I blamed myself for my attitude because I could have waited until they all finish without listening to the permission of the former gentleman.. what I did was I left my place then went where I was in the begining ..It wasn't embarrassing to me but rather I refused to take this place and whose turn is not fully content....

      The end is not so important But the point here is that I was aware of our "social accepted standards" that socially it is not favourable to keep a lady waiting for her turn among a group of men... that's why the man, in the first place, let me in and therefore with knowing this in mind, I accepted it.. it is not always a question of wanting to go first or politeness but rather respect for these social governing standards

      I'll come here later for you 2nd point and PARDON Me for this LOOONG reply
      :)

      Lavender

    • There are examples of rude behabiour everywhere and I see many daily... have so many people forgotten some of the basic protocols? manners? or never learned them? I'm sure the
      ?older generation had them? So what happened

      Oh... the queuing concept... what can I say about this. I guess it depends where. I am used
      .and don't mind queuing actually cause where I come from this is embedded in daily life
      Everywhere you go you have to queue. I can accept and respect the order of people arriving
      .to a queue

      u have experienced after being the only lady in a queue, some gentlemen will ask u to go to the front but u will not do that unless u asked but still shyly advance to the front feeling a bit
      .guilty

      I think mostly, where women and queuing are concerned I like the fact that in most places here there are queus for ladies... I appreciate that a lot. Don't think banks have that... or do
      ?they

      Even though I see more and more examples of rudeness every day I still refuse to give in


      If you see and old man or women, women w/children waiting to cross the road... How many
      ?of you stop and give way

      If traffic is heavy and on 2 way street and on opposite lane (in front across from you) a car indicates that he wants to turn, and there are few cars behind you. Do you stop and give
      ?way and therefore also ease traffic on other lane

      ?If in a bus/train how many men give up their seats if a woman (young or old) is standing
      )?(and this is not so you can take her phone number ok

      ?How many will hold the door for someone else


      I know all of us have busy schedules and agendas to keep up with, but will it hurt much to
      ?stop and be polite to another being once in a while


      :Important Note
      I know some of you are going to be annoyed with what I have written. Before you go on typing like keyboard warriors showing your true intellect
      wanting to tell me that I am wrong and what do I know, know that
      this is my personal opinion, not necessarily representative of Omani
      society as a whole and that I am from Oman

      reGARds....oMaNi_AsLi
    • B]hello Omani Asli
      first ...i would like to thank you for scolding us ...really the English section is no longer like before...you know what it's the same resaon as Lavender said (boring) myself no longer participate in not only in this section but in the forum ...

      anyway let me respond to your topic ...you know WHAT?? there is a silly saying that (Ladies first ) so most (i don't say ALL)~!@@ad ~!@@ad of the time they study this saying in their minds and running over others ...or maybe they believe that they are the only people who are busy and have many things behind ...we daily see like your action...sometimes you believe that its your right to go first since its your turn so yoi fight ...but sometimes we should just shut up and wait her majesty to finish ...

      for your second action
      i don't know maybe i didn't get it ...what do you really mean
      as i understand ...you believe that if you give the way for a female she has to show you that she appreciates your favor ...AM RIGHT?????~!@q ~!@q[/B(i will come back after your expanation)
      nice discussion in your reply
      thanks very much
    • oMaNi_AsLi كتب:




      Another thing,
      I find that while driving and when traffic allows it, I give way to people men and
      women, most men reply with a gesture of thanks, but not
      one single lady does!!! I understand if there was a man who let them pass
      and they did not want to wave or signal their thanks,.... what is their problem
      So sad.. just hope one day they meet their match or
      someone puts them in their place, without them
      .running to their bros or uncles or daddy's... and admit they were wrong

      [grade='FFA500 FF6347 008000 4B0082']reGARds......oMaNi_AsLi[/grade]



      Good Morning 2 all :)

      Omani Asli Now coming to your 2nd point as I promised... this is very true, I've noticed this but haven't got through "yet"....isn't it really surprising that we can see this obvious as it is something that have been agreed upon among ladies... I'll tell onething that I believe it one of the main reasons for not showing any sign of appreciation to men in particular... But I cannot say this is completely true without comparing this reaction to their reaction to women letting them pass (if a woman not aman free a pass for them, would they react the same???) If so, then I totally agree with you...this should not be the way it is and we all should really think of changing this because it is a real question of politeness and rudeness and it is not striking if someone got annoyed or even angry by this...



      However, Omani Asli bro. let us think in this way

      If I were in this situation, I would just nod my head down as a kind of saying thanks but not neccesary I see in your face ... perhaps the reason of this, as I assume, may be that we are socially brought up not to show any sign of approval to men who we don't know (I need your comments LADIES , isn't this right to some extent?~!@q ) ... .

      Omani Asli

      Not all women are alike as not all men are alike too... some women will do any kind of gestures as to say thanks, some will not say or show any appreciating sign and this is a complete rudeness and impoliteness as you said, some others will stay away from doing any kind of these facial or hand approving gestures although they are deeply thanking you because they would think that you would interpret it in another way... so to say for men, some will feel that she is thanking them and some will interpret it as "she is not a GOOD GIRL $$t " or she wants to go further$$g , and, therefore, they prefer not doing this to avoid this misinterpretation...

      I'm not trying to give excuses for "us" as ladies but this is a feminine interpretation of how our minds work as women ...you may miss this but I can say this is true somehow

      Regards, lavender:)
    • Lavender كتب:

      Good Morning 2 all :)

      Omani Asli Now coming to your 2nd point as I promised... this is very true, I've noticed this but haven't got through "yet"....isn't it really surprising that we can see this obvious as it is something that have been agreed upon among ladies... I'll tell onething that I believe it one of the main reasons for not showing any sign of appreciation to men in particular... But I cannot say this is completely true without comparing this reaction to their reaction to women letting them pass (if a woman not aman free a pass for them, would they react the same???) If so, then I totally agree with you...this should not be the way it is and we all should really think of changing this because it is a real question of politeness and rudeness and it is not striking if someone got annoyed or even angry by this...



      However, Omani Asli bro. let us think in this way

      If I were in this situation, I would just nod my head down as a kind of saying thanks but not neccesary I see in your face ... perhaps the reason of this, as I assume, may be that we are socially brought up not to show any sign of approval to men who we don't know (I need your comments LADIES , isn't this right to some extent?~!@q ) ... .

      Omani Asli

      Not all women are alike as not all men are alike too... some women will do any kind of gestures as to say thanks, some will not say or show any appreciating sign and this is a complete rudeness and impoliteness as you said, some others will stay away from doing any kind of these facial or hand approving gestures although they are deeply thanking you because they would think that you would interpret it in another way... so to say for men, some will feel that she is thanking them and some will interpret it as "she is not a GOOD GIRL $$t " or she wants to go further$$g , and, therefore, they prefer not doing this to avoid this misinterpretation...

      I'm not trying to give excuses for "us" as ladies but this is a feminine interpretation of how our minds work as women ...you may miss this but I can say this is true somehow

      Regards, lavender:)



      I understand what you are saying... Wherever I go I try to understand culture and behaviours of people. I'm far from completely undertanding everything but, I know that women(in some cultures more than in others) are 'discouraged' from even making the smallest gesture to an
      .unknown man, a stranger, someone outside their home

      ,When I give way in traffic (as is the example here) I do it not for the thanks, it's a courtesy but I've been taught that the polite thing to do when someone extends a courtesy is to at least nod? I'm a stranger to them, yes, but a girl nevertheless. I have been driving for what seems like ages and even though I love it, I know it can be very stressful with more cars than before on the roads, that is why I give way many times. They should teach a 'courtesy on
      .the road' module as part of the driving course

      I know that not every man or woman fits the 'rude' examples given above... maybe I've just
      ....seen many consecutive cases

      [frame='1 80']


      :Important Note
      I know some of you are going to be annoyed with what I have written. Before you go on typing like keyboard warriors showing your true intellect wanting to tell me that I am wrong and what do I know, know thatthis is my personal opinion, not necessarily representative of Omanisociety as a whole and that I am from Oman
      [/frame]
      reGARds....oMaNi_AsLi
    • hi all
      Omani Asli i will reply even you didn't pay attention or replied to my reply ...i didn't say it's rudeness as we discussed here but ...i said~!@q ~!@q he might forget to respond or he was busy ...:) :) #e #e
      so got your idea correctly ...look as a girl myself sometimes think how could i say thank you for a man in his car ...let me explain more by giving you an example ...
      this happend many times but i remember once
      i was waiting beside the road in the SQU i wanted to across the road ...i was waiting you can say for more than 3 minutes ...people in a hurry... even if i had a class after few minutes it didn't mean that i threw myself in the road ...then eventually, a bus(a14 passengers bus) full of guys stopped i said to myself how could i say thank you ...so i just passed and Allah knew that i said thanks ... i beleive in this case its enough to be between you and your God ...tens actions similar to this one happened to me and many other girls but we couldn't say (thank you very much ) for the same reason but for me when someone do fevuor for me when i could say thank you i said it but to make signs in the middle of the road $$-e $$-e it is very difficult ...not because we are shy but our society (believe me) will think negatively ...in other words
      ابعد عن الشر وغني له (واذا صوتك ما حلو ...اسكت احسن ههههه)
      you know what ...you can see my topic in the university students section i wrote a similer topic about politness and rudness maybe a year ago ... i believe it was one of the successulf
      topics i ever write in this forum.....
      unfotrunately i didn't remember the title of the topic i will check if it is still there and write to you

      wish you luck and thank you very much for encouraging us to write #e #e #e
    • I couldnt agree more, Omani Asli

      I think its a cultural problem

      incidents like yours happened to me alot, and mostly, believe it or not, because the people think i am not Omani , so for some reason they think its ok to jump infront of the queue while i am standing, or just push themselves in front of me

      when this happens, i actually talk to them and tell them "cant you see i am standing in queue???s have some respect!!!!i

      Even if i wasnt Omani, what makes them think they could be this rude just because someone is different???s

      Another point you brought up, Omani Asli

      The women here allow themselves to do rude things, thinking that thier excuse is that they are women!!!!i

      this is plain degrading in itself!!!i

      like jumping in the start of the line of men.... just because she is a woman doesnt mean she gets special treatment!!!i

      i dont know, whether its rudness, disrespect, or simply a cultural belief that justifies these actions in some inconvincing way!!!!!i